心理学者明

Lina, your pain is understandable. A friendship that felt like sisterhood can leave a deep wound when it turns into hurtful words and public humiliation. The first step is to acknowledge your feelings-the ache in your heart is valid, and ignoring it won’t make it disappear. You’ve shared a significant part of your life with her, so the idea of letting go might feel like losing a piece of yourself. But ask yourself: Does this friendship still bring you joy, or does it now drain you more than it nourishes you?

If you decide to try and restore the bond, begin with an honest conversation. Choose a private, calm setting where you can express how her words and actions have affected you. Use “I” statements to avoid sounding accusatory, such as “I feel hurt when I’m spoken to that way in front of others”. This approach focuses on your emotions rather than attacking her character, which may help her see the impact of her behavior without becoming defensive. However, be prepared for the possibility that she may not recognize the pain she’s caused or may not be willing to change. People sometimes grow apart, and the person she was 10 years ago may no longer be the person she is today.

On the other hand, if the pattern of belittling and insults continues despite your efforts, it may be a sign that the relationship has become toxic. Holding onto a friendship out of fear of loss or loneliness can sometimes do more harm than good. You deserve relationships that uplift you, not ones that leave you feeling small. Letting go doesn’t mean erasing the memories or the love you once shared, but it might mean accepting that this chapter has come to an end. It’s okay to grieve the loss of what was, but also remind yourself that you are worthy of respect and kindness, whether it comes from her or from others who value you.

Consider what you truly want for yourself in the long run. Do you want a friendship where you constantly have to justify your worth, or do you want one where you feel seen, heard, and valued? Sometimes, the hardest choice is the healthiest one. If you do decide to distance yourself, lean on other supportive people in your life, or even consider journaling or therapy to process the emotions. You’re not alone in this, and your feelings matter.