心理学家明悦

Hello Lina, thank you for sharing your struggles with self-esteem and confidence. It is very common for adults to experience feelings of not being good enough, especially in social comparisons. Building a healthier relationship with your self-confidence is a gradual process that involves both internal work and external awareness. A foundational step is to practice self-compassion and mindful self-talk. Instead of trying to force positivity, acknowledge your anxious feelings before social situations without judgment. This acceptance can reduce their power over you. You can also work on setting small, achievable personal goals to create evidence of your capabilities, which slowly rebuilds trust in yourself. For assertiveness, start by expressing your needs in low-stakes environments and remind yourself that your perspective is valid, which helps mitigate guilt.

Regarding your concern about manipulation, it is wise to learn the signs of gaslighting, which is a form of psychological manipulation. Key signs include someone consistently denying your reality or memories, making you question your own perceptions, and using confusion to gain control. Other signs are trivializing your feelings, shifting blame onto you, and withholding information. To protect yourself, maintain a personal journal to document interactions and your feelings. This creates an objective record you can reference when doubts arise. Strengthening your internal confidence makes you less vulnerable to such tactics. Remember, building confidence is not about eliminating self-doubt entirely but developing the resilience to manage it. If these feelings become overwhelming, consider seeking support from a qualified psychologist for personalized guidance.